Three months ago, a friend’s comment cut me deep.

We were wrapping up a Zoom call when he said, “I feel grateful to see a side of you that your audience doesn’t.” He meant it as a compliment. But instead of lifting me up, his words sent me down a spiral.

Why?

Because it was a magnifying glass on a problem I had long ignored:

My inauthenticity.

What happened next has been life-changing. Give me 5 minutes, and I’ll explain.

The mask you wear

I love my business, but sometimes feel trapped by it.

As a writer, you are both an artist and an entrepreneur. There’s a tension between doing what is optimal and doing what you want. And often, I’ve found the allure of marketing to override the deeper meaning.

Consider my friend’s comment.

He sees a different side of me because I’m in a phase of deep exploration. The past year, I’ve been running experiments with stuff like somatic therapy, psychedelics, moving countries, learning languages, overcoming trauma, rewiring scripts, and much more.

This stuff is changing my life, but I haven’t shared most of it.

Why? Because I’m meant to be a ‘writing guy’.

It’s not exactly my niche. You’re told to stick to your lane to build your business. And for a long time, I listened to that script.

But recently, I began to realise the cost of not being authentic.

And trust me, it isn’t worth paying.

The hidden cost of inauthenticity

Authenticity is not how you act around other people. It’s how little you’d change when they are not around.

It’s an overused word these days, but for good reason—it shapes your life. Every day, every decision, you are bombarded by what you ‘should’ do. Make more money, achieve more status, and please more people.

Sometimes this aligns with what you want. But often, it pulls you away from your centre.

The difficulty is that incentives can scream much louder than your intuition.

For example, when I was a dentist, I didn’t enjoy my work. But I was a young, insecure guy, so I enjoyed what it gave me. Reputation, respect, and a good paycheck. Goddamn, did they feel good. But only on the surface level. Because I’d dread every drive to work. And as time ticked by, I couldn’t stop thinking:

“Is this it?”

I thought you had to suffer to succeed. But really, I was just out of alignment.

And that’s what inauthenticity feels like. It’s a wrongness. Perhaps you’ve experienced it too. You know something isn’t quite right. You’re working hard, but it never feels like enough. Wins are just brief bursts of joy followed by a deeper discontent. You start looking around and comparing yourself to people who seem happier, more successful, more like ‘they have it figured out’.

But the problem is precisely that:

We think external results are more important than the internal feeling.

Let me give you an example (and what to do about it)

The trap of success

I quit dentistry in 2021 to become a writer.

It was the scariest decision of my life. People thought I had lost my mind. But it was the first time I felt like I had found it. Sure, I didn’t succeed immediately. But every day I woke excited to work.

I was no longer fighting myself to succeed. I was just doing what I wanted.

That was the first time I felt authentic.

But as the results rolled in, so did my insecurity. My passion project became so serious because I was terrified of losing what I had. I began playing by other people’s rules because they ‘knew the path’—and I didn’t trust myself to follow my own.

And that’s how you begin to lose yourself:

Fear.

And it’s around the corner of every decision.

We’re so scared to be ourselves that we punish anyone for trying. If everyone stays in the crowd, we don’t need to face the fact that we’re living someone else’s life. So we’ve created a system that celebrates hard work and hustle so long as it’s within the agreed boundaries. Step outside and you’re the crazy one.

But true courage is having the guts to carve your own path.

Because only you get to live your life. And there are no points for climbing the wrong mountain.

For example, it’s so rare for someone to turn their passion into their career. But why? Does it defy the laws of physics? Nope. It’s hard because it’s scary. You have to accept the short-term pain of less money, less security, and less certainty. You have to say no when the world says yes. You have to follow your curiosity and ignore the crowd.

But ask anyone who has pulled it off: you will never feel more alive.

And that’s the reward for authenticity:

Energy.

When you love what you do, work feels like play. And that is how we’ll make our best contribution.

My experiment with authenticity

Nobody can compete with you at being you. The aim is to have your writing and business as an extension of yourself. You want to do what lights you up, and bring your audience along for the ride.

But that’s bloody terrifying.

And I don’t have the balls for big changes.

So after my friend’s comments, I decided to run an experiment.

What if I aimed for 10% more bravery for 3 months?

Some decisions I made:

1. Write a long weekly newsletter sharing more personal stories.
2. Stopped running product launches every month to buy back time for my book.
3. Spend more time on other projects (personal stuff, not directly tied to an ROI).

The 3-month experiment ended this week.

What happened?

Well, I made a bit less money.

But my energy skyrocketed. I’ve been able to write for 6 hours a day, no problemo. The feedback on some of the essays has been the best I’ve ever had. My content has sparked connections with people I respect because I’m showing more of myself. I’ve found ideas I love to write about and can’t wait to explore further.

Kieran Drew @ItsKieranDrew Not gonna lie, that’s a hell of a compliment for yesterday's newsletter. On the right track 💪 4:30 PM • Nov 13, 2025 2 Retweets 25 Likes Read 7 replies

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“Being told one of my newsletters was like if Tim Ferriss and Kieran Drew had a baby was one of my highlights. I hope I’m the guy in that relationship.”

Plus, when I launched a high-ticket offer in November, the spaces were snapped up in one email by people who loved the ‘fresher angle’.

So my fears were misplaced.

I’m growing my business, but on my terms.

And goddamn does it feel good.

Scary, but good.

For example, 3 days ago, I had to call off a cohort because it wasn’t what I truly wanted to do. Sure, that’s a big financial hit. But I’m reinvesting all this time into writing. I can’t tell you if that’s a smart bet because I’m finding out myself.

But I can tell you this:

It is hard to be wrong when everything feels right.

When you operate from alignment, you have so much energy. And success hits different when it’s doing something you love. Less fear, more fun. And fun is such an underrated tool for success. You have no problem playing a game for decades when it comes naturally to you.

So here’s my challenge to you as we enter 2026:

What does 10% more you look like?

Perhaps you’ve got a weird hobby you’ve been too busy to pursue. Or you’ve been hanging out with people whom you don’t enjoy. Or there’s a topic you want to write about, an offer you want to build.

For the next 3 months, give yourself permission to explore.

True courage is being yourself in a world that constantly wants you to fit in,

Kieran

P.S.

I’d love to hear what experiment you set yourself. If this resonated, reach out. I reply to every email.